nationals...

Probably should've been the biggest post on this silly blog, but the Milwaukee Journal Sential published a post of mine and a link without my permission (which I guess is fine, it is on the intranetz) but ever since I've been getting some views and comments I'd rather not. So I decided to keep this private for a while until whoever that was got a new hobby. I think they made chat roulette for people like you. Cause really, the only thing dorkier than having a blog, is stalking mine.

But anyways, nationals.

Strikes & gutter balls.

I won the collegiate race. That was cool. I figured I had a snowball's chance in hell, so I went for it in the beginning, got a little gap and kept it.

The elite/U23 race was later that day. Kaitie and I were racing for the U23. The first three laps we rode around together making silly faces like this:

But I think it was good for us. We pushed each other pretty hard and at one point we were riding in 8th. It felt pretty awesome to be doing well in the elite race at nationals!

Two-ish to go I had a dork attack and crashed pretty hard. The mud and fatigue of two races were wearing on me and I crashed pretty hard. It hurt alot to ride but I didn't want to DNF my last race of the year so I pedaled around the last two laps and lost like 20 spots. But I'm glad to have finished at least, although I couldn't put a race together that reflected how I felt that day. But that's bike racing! Kaitie rode on to finish 10th and win the U23 race. Somebody was trying to make rivals out of us, but I really couldn't think of anyone I'd rather race against, respect more, or would rather see do well than Kaitie. When I think back to racing cx in Wisconsin, wearing sweet flintstone costumes and falling over barriers (well, she never did that and I still do) it's crazy to think of the amount of hard work that's happened since.

So that was nationals. I wish I had another excuse to go back to Bend.

(Upon re-reading, I hope this blog doesn't sound too negative. It was really an awesome trip and 'cross this year was an incredible experience. I hope fifty years from now, when I reminisce about these adventures (from my personal space craft that I just completed time travel in. It is the future.) that I won't remember the mess ups, but I'll remember all the wonder. That wild sense of adventure that flooded the freeway nights, driving with with clayton 14 hours straight. The laughter as we stole bread from dumpsters, too poor and frugal to go buy a meal. I'll remember the songs of the Appalachians, the empty, beautiful space of the Midwest, and the promise of the Pacific ocean. And I hope I'll still be so grateful for the two wheels that took me to it all.

2010, I have to keep you folded up for now. But one day I'll take you back out. Like a sepia faded photograph, I'll trace your lines. I'll see new meanings in the contours. Like an old sweater, I'll find your holes, acknowledge all the heartbreak and sadness you brought me, and, hopefully, realize all the light in the good times. 2010 wasn't the death of my Dad and stepfather, but the rememberance of life. Of two men I was so fortunate to have in mine, and that sense of wonder. Of adventure. Of being 20 years old and driving down freeways at night with my best friend. Of riding bicycles, the simplicity of wonder and the complexity of travel. Through everything.